Suicide Titans
by awsomerebel55
Summary: The World is filled with heroes, but there are always the ones that have to take on the bad guys that do not play by the rules. Amanda Waller has put together a far more effective team for this world. Meet the Suicide Titans. Suicide Squad version of Teen Titans. I do not own Teen Titans.
1. A Day that Will Live in Infamy

**A Day that Will Live in Infamy**

An event unlike anything else had occurred.

Jump City had been attacked by aliens in search of a runaway alien. The city itself had been nearly destroyed by the invading aliens, had it not been by the interference of five super powered _teenage_ superheroes. Robin the boy wonder, Batman's sidekick and partner who had taken up the protector mantel of his own. Cyborg a cybernetic package of high military range equipment and brains of a extremely intelligent professor. Raven a powerful sorceress with an unknown past. Starfire an alien from beyond the stars with powers that could rival those of Superman. And finally Beast Boy the runt of the Doom Patrol that had gone out on its own. These heroes had not only saved the city but had also made the government look inadequate.

A tall dark skinned African American woman wearing a blue ocean suit and high heel shoes was looking at the pictures of the heroes, the alien invaders and the city. Her dark hair and eyes narrowed slightly at the sight of the aliens and their destruction. This woman didn't like to play around, this woman was a government agent responsible for the creation of Task Force X, this was Amanda Waller.

Amanda Waller was looking at the footage of the battle making absolutely sure that she didn't miss a single detail. Not only had the government been made look like a waste of time, but not even her special task force had been able to do anything to protect the city. She was not angry at the people that praised the heroes for their actions nor was she angry at the young heroes that took action when no one else would. NO, she was angry that said people and heroes worked so recklessly.

She had then a stroke of an idea, since the bad guys had been getting smarter and had been going for targets that even the Justice League couldn't defend. She needed a team that could go where no one would go, a team that could go through a hurricane and come out without a scratch, she needed a different form of a Suicide Squad.

She then took out her special phone and pressed a button on the center of the screen.

"Time to begin our newest special ops program. I am now invoking Protocol New Titans. I am also renaming the new team from Task Force Z to the Suicide Titans. Bring them all here." said Amanda Waller

* * *

 **New York city**

At a New York city bank at the middle of the night a tall teenage woman around 16 years of age wearing a black leotard that covered her entire body and mask was in the process of pouring her hand into the keyhole of the vault. She shifted her hand like it was made of plastic and made it turn until it got the shape of the key she needed. She then opened the vault to the sight of loads of gold and money. She stepped inside and pulled off her mask to reveal her fair skin and black hair with a purple highlight that fell to her right side of her face.

She smirked and walked towards the loot and took out a laundry bag and proceeded to fill it with money.

"Guess dad was right after all money is quite the sight." said the girl

She took a handful of the money and dropped it into the bad. However she was then shot with a strong tranquilizer dart on her back that made her slowly turn to see several fully covered men wearing black ops uniforms.

"Miss Abigail Shay AKA Plastic Girl, you are coming with us." said the team leader

"Ah, shoot." said Plastic Girl before everything went dark

* * *

 **Mexico City**

In Mexico City a young 16 year old man was running through the streets being chased by a gang of thugs that were armed to the teeth. He wore a black undershirt and a pair of blue jeans and a pair of black running shoes. He had short dark brown hair and deep red eyes.

He kept running and running from a gang just by crossing their territory without their permission. He jumped and slide through obstacles such as boxes, trash cans and laundry lines that went from one building to the next. To most this seemed like a horrible circumstance but for this young man it was far more dangerous for his chasers than for himself.

However, as fate would have it he turned into a dead end of an alleyway. He was not fast enough to turn as he crashed into the brick wall and was forced to face his attackers.

"Por favor, no quiero lastimarlos. (Please, I do not want to hurt you.)" said the young man

"¿Tu vas a lastimarnos? No, nosotros to vamos a lastimar pequeño demonio. (You are going to hurt us? No, we are going to hurt you you little devil.)" said the ring leader

As the gang members began to laugh the young man could hear voices of many people around him and the crew of vandals. He tried to cover his ears but he couldn't avoid the transparent people floating above the gang members. From women to men to young and old every single ghost cried for the same thing and the young cornered man could not help but hear every single word.

"Venganos (Avenge Us)."

With those words uttered the young man burst into flames and his face was covered by black and red marks that made him look like a demon from hell itself. The black marks darkened his eyes, eyebrows, mouth, chin, and circled around his face while the red marks covered everything within the circle making his boyish innocent face resemble a face that would make the scariest of monsters or even the devil himself cower in fear.

At this sight the gang of thugs began to cower in fear and stepped back. Then the young man spoke in a deep demonic voice striking fear into the hearts of all that stood in front of him.

"Pecadores. Eh venido para hacerlos pagar. Yo soy El Diablo. (Sinners. I have come to make you pay. I am El Diablo.)" said El Diablo as he created a fiery whip.

El Diablo began to reduce the gang members to ashes by blasting them with Hell Fire or by slicing them with his fire whip. He snared the gang leader as he tried to run only to blast him with his open palm straight to his face.

After the gang was no more El Diablo returned to his previous form being feeling completely drained of power. He fell to his knees and began taking several deep breaths until a tranquilizer dart struck him in the back knocking him out.

"Rafael Valiente AKA El Diablo is secured." said the same Black Ops agent

* * *

 **New Orleans**

In the middle of Mardi Gras a mafia boss was celebrating his biggest business score. He had recently opened up a brand new hotel and casino in New Orleans after only demolishing an orphanage, a pet store, and a kitty orphanage. All was good in his world. Suddenly as he drank his Scotch someone knocked on his door. He then went to meet whoever was foolish enough to bother him in his time of triumph. Once he opened the door he was met with a surprise boxing glove on a spring shot to punch him straight in the face. The mafia boss falls down on his butt with his hand covering his face.

Just as the mafia boss was getting up a mysterious colorful figure jumps over him and lands with its back to him. As the mafia boss turns to see his assailant he notices that the figure is a young woman. Although she wasn't looking at him he could tell it was a woman.

"Who the hell are you?" demanded the mafia boss

"I am the jester of justice, the laugh in the face of danger, I am your worst nightmare." said the girl

She turned to let the mafia boss look at her. She had straight pink hair made into a short pony tail, blue sky eyes and lightly tanned skin and a generous body. She wore a green one piece suit with a skirt and a red and purple hood with two harlequin pig tails that had jingle bells on the tips. The hood was divided into four squares one red then a purple one then a red one and then a purple one again. She had elbow long purple hand gloves with puffy white wrists, and thigh high stripped red and green socks and purple shoes.

"What the Hell." said the mafia boss confused out of his mind

"I am Jester and I am here to teach you a lesson." said Jester

She then gave the mafia boss an axe kick sending him flying up, and then she proceeded to punch his stomach. She then pulled out two billy clubs and began hitting the mafia boss. The mafia boss then pulled out a gun but Jester struck it out of his and and delivered a flying kick to his face.

With a sinister smile Jester got close to the mafia boss and began to tie him up like a little piggy. She then pulled him up to the ceiling with a rope giving him the definition of a underwear pull making him scream through the stinky sock stuck in his mouth.

Just then a Black Ops team burst through the door to see the feared mafia boss cry like a bully getting a super wedgy.

"Oh dear lord." said one of the operatives

"What? You don't like?" said Jester before being shot in the neck with a tranquilizer dart.

"Duela Dent AKA Jester is secure. Man pour bastard." said the leader

* * *

 **Unknown Location**

In a large cell completely covered in white was in a disclosed location a young man was doing push ups. He was well built but not too muscular with a few scars on his body, three on his back going the upper left side to the lower right, one on his right shoulder and a final one on his left pectoral. He had sort brown hair and brown eyes and wore black combat pants and boots. He continued to do push ups until he heard something. He got up and looked around his cell. He looked towards where the door was and listened to the gun fire at the other side of it.

He then heard that there were people at the other end of the door were trying to get the door open. He then got into a combat position as the door was busted open by a group of Black Ops.

As they entered the young man began to fight them all. He grabbed the first one's rifle and pulled the agent to punch him in the face. He then elbowed the second man on the right temple knocking him out. The young man then pulled the two rifles and began to open fire on the assault team making them fall back. He used this chance to burst through the group of Black Ops and began making a run for it shooting and kicking the team. The Black Ops then returned fire making the young man roll out of the way. He then was intercepted by another two Black Ops and made him throw the rifle hitting the agents and then began punching and kicking the other agent.

Suddenly tranquilizer darts were shot at the boy's back only for him to grab an agent to take the shots. He was then grabbed by three agents that began to beat the young man until a forth agent shot him with a tranquilizer darts, finally subduing the young man.

"Subject Alpha AKA Comedian is secure, to no small effort." said the leader


	2. Bootcamp

**Bootcamp**

 **Unknown Location**

Comedian began to regain consciousness inside what could only be described as a large test field for military purposes. He slowly got up feeling like he was waking up from a deep hibernation, as his vision began to get back he spotted three other people besides him. A boy around his age from Latin American descent dressed in a black undershirt, blue jeans and black running shoes. Then there were two girls one that looked like a traditional harlequin but with a hood and cape, and another one that looked like a cat burglar with her black suit.

He had no idea as to who they were or why they were all here but he did knew one thing he felt heavier than before for some reason. Maybe the tranquilizers had yet to fully wear off, but then Comedian looked to his hand and noticed that he was wearing black fingerless gloves, and armband protections. In his chest he wore some sort of black bulletproof vest with heavy armored shoulder pats, but the weirdest part of his new wardrobe was the smiling face pin stuck to his left pectoral.

"Who the hell put this on me?!" asked Comedian loudly enough to wake up the other three kids

As the other three kids began to fully recover from their naps they each had a different reaction to their new environment.

"Well, this has to be the biggest joke in the face of the earth. I was almost sure that I was going to prison this time." said Plastic Girl stretching without using her powers.

"¿Que pasa? (What's going on?) Am I in the United States?" asked El Diablo questioning what happened.

"That was a good nap. Ooo, look at that beef cake over there. I now know I can go commando with him." said Jester looking at Comedian with a mischievous smile.

Comedian just walked away from Jester confused at her claim due to his lack of interaction with women and normal people in general.

"Ok, who are you people and why do I look like I am wearing the left over equipment of some sort of vigilante? Talk now or freaky gets it first." said Comedian getting in a combat position.

Just as they were about to duke it out a door opened up and revealed Amanda Waller walking up to the teens with a man around his thirties wearing a Black Ops suit and was holding a large metal briefcase. She stopped in front of the teens and then proceeded to speak with a voice full of authority.

"My name is Amanda Waller and I am here to explain your situation. You have been recruited for a new off the records Black Ops group recently renamed the Suicide Titans. You are now the newest members of this team and you shall receive training and go on missions that will involve taking down villains, terrorist groups, heck, even governments themselves. From now on you shall live, eat, and train here in this base called Tartarus. In exchange for your services you shall receive compensation in a satisfactory manner. Any questions?" finished Waller

Understandably all of them raised their hands.

"Plastic Girl, you first." said Waller

"What do you mean by "compensation"?" asked Plastic Girl

"Keeping you all out of prison for starters, in your particular case your mother's treatment will not be suspended and will be taken care of." said Waller earning widen eyes from Plastic Girl

"Shouldn't one have to be an American citizen to be indoctrinated into this kind of team?" asked El Diablo

"That was quite a mouthful young man but no. You have all been classified as assets for this team in one way or another, I believe that an avenging demon such as yourself would be more than onboard to punish those that do evil." said Waller making El Diablo look away in fear.

"Do we get puppies?" asked Jester with a smile

"No. Even trans-dimentional beings such as yourself Ms. Dent must follow rules." said Waller making Jester pout.

"Again, I ask why am wearing this?" asked Comedian

"That's your new uniform. You all will have codenames and will address each other with such names. In the same order as I answered your questions you shall receive your new name. Plastic Girl, El Diablo, Jester, and finally Comedian." said Waller pointing to each one of the teens.

"Why am I being called the Comedian?" asked Comedian

"Because I say so. This here is agent Neo, he will be teaching you four the ropes, I suggest to take this seriously." said Waller leaving the room.

After Amanda Waller had left the room agent Neo how pulled out a a remote. He pressed a button and then the lights turned on to show a shooting range, an obstacle course, and giant boxing ring.

"You heard the lady! I will be your instructor and you will listen to me, and we might just get along enough to survive past your first mission. Now each of you will traverse this obstacle course and pass certain standards after that you will go on your first mission." said agent Neo

Reluctantly the team made their way to the training grounds and began to take their positions.

First came the shooting range where Comedian grabbed a pair of hand guns and took aim at the robots that came at him. As the automatons charged at the Comedian he began shooting them down with his guns. Many of the bullets that were flying missed their targets and some of the bullets managed to strike the targets. He shot the first two in the head and the third in the head then the fourth one in the neck. He then began shooting at the other four running robots who began to dodge the bullets with ease. This made the Comedian angry and he began to shoot faster and eventually got the first three by shooting them in the legs and in their heads. Then the buzz sounded signaling the end of the round.

"Congratulations Comedian, you took out eight test dummies in the time you could take down twenty. You wasted too many bullets and you need to improve your aim." said agent Neo

Then came the turn of Plastic Girl to beat a few robots in the boxing ring. She began by by giving straight jabs with her stretched arms knocking some of the robots. She then turned her right fist into a giant hammer and turned another robot into a pancake. She then began to jump around by turning her legs into springs and dodge all the attacks of the robots who then grabbed the springs and pulled her down gave her a quick beating and then threw her out of the ring in a tangled mess.

"Good, but not good enough Plastic Girl. You need more combat training and better control of your powers." said agent Neo earning a glare of Plastic Girl

The third exercise was an obstacle course that was attempted by Jester. She began by running towards the hall that had boxing gloves coming out of the walls. Jester dodged the random punching gloves by doing cartwheels and jumping over and under the punches. She then reached the jumping balls and began jumping from one to the next in complete succession without falling to the water. She then climbed up the rocky wall with great grace and agility that could be only matched by that of an expert climber. Finally Jester arrived at the buzzsaw section of the course she then continued towards the quick movement of the blades that would spell death for her. She jumped over the blades and continued onwards quickly dodging the hazards of her course, which left her teammates in a state of awe. After Jester jumped over the last buzzsaw she saw the finish line and began walking without a worry until the floor under her opened up and made her fall into the mud.

"Jester, not bad, you are a gifted acrobatic fighter and you are good thinking on your feet. However the second you stop you leave yourself quite open and easy to strike." said Neo as Jester cleaned herself up.

It was then finally the turn of El Diablo, all he had to do was battle a combat robot his own size but he wouldn't get on the ring.

"Alright Diablo, explain to me please, why won't you go into the ring and fight the robot?" asked Neo

"I would rather not battle anyone sir. You see I am not really me when I use my powers. I only use them if the situation demands it." explained Diablo

"The situation is training, and I am demanding it. I understand that this is hard for you, for all of you. But what we are doing here is so that you do not die on the field. So get up there and turn that hunk of junk into melted steel now." said Neo

However Diablo remained unchanged. This was also the moment that Comedian joined in and decided to put on his two cents of knowledge.

"You know what. I think that you are scared. You are scared of cutting loose, of doing what you are meant to do." said Comedian

"I am not afraid of that, and I am not taking this from a guy who is not even funny and crashed his test." said Diablo

"Well I rather crash and burn that stand there like an easy target. Come on I want to see what you can do." said Comedian

"You want to see what I can do?!" asked Diablo

"YEAH! I WANNA SEE WHAT YOU GOT! COWARD!" yelled Comedian

"¿¡COBARDE?! (COWARD?!) THAT'S IT YOU'RE MINE HUNK OF JUNK!" yelled Diablo as he got up to the ring with his markings already on his face lit up.

Diablo created his whip of Hell Fire and charged at the robot and blasted it until the robot was nothing more than a molted puddle of goo. But Diablo did not stop there he continued on until the boxing ring and everything around it was nothing more than ash and melted steel.

"Alright, this was an interesting outcome. Diablo you need to stop being afraid of your powers and keep your pride in check." said Neo as the last bit of fire was being put out.

Now that the team had gone through the training course they were taking a break and getting to know one another.

"Just so you know I was only trying to get you to go through this thing no ill will against you." said Comedian to Diablo

"Yeah I know, thanks for the push. I always thought that I would end up in prison not being turned into some sort of Black Ops walking flamethrower. I honestly do not know how my powers work they seem to work at will but when I hear the spirits of the innocent begging me to take vengeance against those that wronged them I feel like my powers are using me." explained Diablo

Comedian thought about what Diablo had just said and then drew out a conclusion.

"Look it isn't that you are being used by your powers, you just need to focus your power and it also depends on when you use them. Make peace with your demons and then you will know what to do. If you only meltdown those that do evil then you will do good." said Comedian

"Thanks man. Rafael Valiente, just so you know." said Diablo shaking Comedian's hand

"I'd tell you my name but I am not sure what it is." said Comedian

"You'll tell me about it later if you want hermano (brother)." said Diablo

At the other side of the room Jester was trying to get Plastic Girl to get some time with her.

"Hey girl friend!" said Jester

"What is wrong with you? You don't just pop up on someone's face with no-good reason." said Plastic Girl

"I just want to be friends, besides I need your help to get that smily face over there with me." said Jester

"I can't tell if you are crazy or just too confused to function in a normal society. What made that Waller lady to recruit you anyway?" asked Plastic Girl

"Maybe it is because I am from another dimension and therefore I am easy to manipulate, or maybe it is because I have single handedly stopped and humiliated the most feared mafia bosses by making them look like piñatas and giving them wedgies." explained Jester

"Wow. Are you for real?" asked Plastic Girl

"Yep, unless that poor guy that they found in New Orleans was just too kinky." said Jester with a giggle

A few minutes later Agent Neo came back in to the training room and got everyone's attention.

"Alright Titans, time for round two of training. Your first mission will be tomorrow. I need to see some improvements in this round or else you will die." said Neo


	3. First Mission Final Test

**First Mission Final Test**

 **Debrief Room**

In the earliest hours of the morning the team had gathered on a small black conference room with a few chairs and a large table. The team sat on the chairs and looked at the front of the room to see Amanda Waller and Agent Neo standing side to side next to a large screen that was turned off.

"Morning team. We will begin now with the debriefing of your first mission. Think of this as your first mission but also think of this as your first and final test." said Neo

"A few weeks ago we managed to hack into a secret super villain academy called The Hive." said Waller

"What are they, bee themed villains?" asked Plastic Girl

"No, however this place is packed with young villains that are looking to learn and reach the big leagues. Besides the students the teachers and the staff are trained mercenaries, the headmaster is a cult fanatic with powerful energy abilities and dangerous mind control powers. The good news are that we know that he is away and out of the country, the bad news are that you are going into the Hive academy and get the information files on every one including graduates. You will be deployed with the cover of the night go through the halls avoiding any all hostiles towards the main computer there you shall take a copy of all their files and then leave the place without getting caught. You leave in thirty minutes." explained Waller

"I suggest you take this time to get your gear and be mentally prepared for anything." said Neo

* * *

The team went to the armory and grabbed their needed equipment. Comedian looked at all the guns that were in the armory and decided to grab a couple of them to get a good feel to them. He first grabbed two SIG-Saucer P228 and gave them a look then tried aiming with one and loads up the ammunition, he then grabbed a Mossberg 590 and pumped it he then loaded it up and grabbed a belt of ammunition, and finally he grabbed a Colt 9mm SMG and grabbed a few cartridges of ammunition. Jester grabbed her billy clubs, smoke bombs, grapple gun, deck of cards, and firecracker balls, she then stuffed them into her belt and made her way out of the armory. Plastic Girl was studying the plans of the academy with great care. Diablo noticed this and approached her.

"Are you alright?" asked Diablo

"Just making sure I am not walking into a dead end." replied Plastic Girl

"You mean we, as in _we_ won't walk into a dead end. You do know this is a team effort, right?" asked Diablo

"I am used to working alone. It is a get in get out job, nothing more nothing less. I've done it a hundred times easy." said Plastic

"But now you are going into a super villain academy. We work together bonita (pretty girl.)." said Diablo

"Did you just called me pretty?" asked Plastic Girl

"Was that wrong?" asked Diablo

"I am way to used to it. But at least you were looking at my face." said Plastic Girl

This made Diablo blush and look away.

Once they were all armed up the team boarded a special plane that would take them to their destination.

* * *

 **Hive Academy**

Using the cover of night the team arrived at their entry point and got ready for their first mission to begin. The giant H shaped yellow building was not difficult to find, and the roof was cleared for landing. The team repelled down and began to put the plan into action. Comedian and Plastic Girl went to the air duct and as Plastic Girl began to remove the screws Comedian held it in place and then pulled it off to open their way into the building. Once open Jester threw some powder to find the air duct was filled with lasers.

"Well, we need a new entry point now." said Jester

"Let me see if I can do something." said Diablo

Diablo formed his face markings and made a small ball of fire and then used the fire to melt all the sensors inside the air duct. He then created a small fire to fry all the cameras and razor blade fans, but the fire also made the ride down a bit painful for some people.

After they all made their way into the hall Comedian used one of his hand guns to take out the cameras. Meanwhile Plastic Girl was rubbing her back to the heat that nearly hurt her.

"Sorry." said Diablo

"It's alright, like you said things are a little bit different than what I'm used to." said Plastic Girl

Comedian silenced them with his hands and then took a peek around the corner to see if the coast was clear. Just as he took a look a pair of robed figures turned to walk towards them. The team hid in the shadows of the hallway and then as the hooded figures walked into the hallway Comedian grabbed the first one and nailed him in the stomach with his knee and then slammed face first into the wall knocking him out. The second hooded man was grabbed by Jester and she performed a choke hold with her right arm and then she pulled out a small taser and zaps the second hooded man into unconsciousness.

After their first obstacles were knocked out the team took their robes and hid themselves in plain sight, Jester however had to wear Plastic Girl who had turned into a cloak similar to the one that they were wearing. With their new disguises the team made their way through the halls towards the headmaster's office. Since it was close to midnight they rarely encountered any other members of the faculty or any of the students. However trouble arose when another member of the the staff passed them by.

"Michael, aren't you suppose to be in the training room with Kid Wicked and Seemore?" asked the robed man

Comedian assumed that he was referring to him and pointed to himself to clarify.

"Yes you. Come on we do not have all night." said the robed man

Comedian turned and whispered to his team.

"I'll catch you later stay safe." said Comedian who then followed the robed man.

Comedian made his way to the training area were the robed man lead him and inside he saw two boys around his age. One of the boys wore a dark black cape and grey costume with devil like horns and had large red eyes. The second kid wore a white suit with an eye on his chest and a helmet that made him look like a cyclops with a large eye.

"So we doing this or what?" asked Seemore

Comedian however remained silent towards the question of the boy.

"He asked you a question. Well?" wondered the robed man

This however was met with an answer in the form of an elbow to the nose and a throw towards Kid Wicked who ducked the flying man but was met with a kick from a combat boot to the face. Seemore was about to change his eye to a laser but waste with the an uppercut from Comedian's right fist. Just as Kid Wicked was getting up something kicked inside Comedian that made everything seem slower for some reason, every action every second became ten for him, Comedian's adrenaline was going nuts. In an instant Comedian blocked Kid Wicked's attack with his armored forearm and then grabbed his shotgun by the handle and then used it as a baseball bat to smack Kid Wicked in the face completely knocking him out.

Seeing as his robe was not as good of a disguise as he thought Comedian ditched it to reveal himself armed and ready.

"Comedian to team I just ditched my robe I will create a distraction while you get what we came for." said Comedian over the radio

"Understood Comedian, but I thought we weren't suppose to break radio silence." said Diablo

"Weren't you also suppose to meet with two of the students?" asked Jester

"Seemore and Kid Wicked, guess they both need to see more and be a little more wicked. Because they are clearly worse at fighting than at choosing names." said Comedian

"Nice one my packed charming prince." said Jester

Comedian made his way out of the gym and straight to the place where he could get the most attention, and what better place than the kitchen and the student rooms. He began by busting down the doors of several dorms and throwing some flares setting small fires in the rooms waking up the student and saying classic one liners.

"Rise and shine punks! Hit it while its hot! Time to clear this pigsty!" screamed Comedian as he woke up and pissed off every single student.

He then went to the kitchen where he unloaded a grenade inside one of the several ovens and opened the gas at the stove. He then got out and ran a good distance as the kitchen burst in flames. This made Comedian go to meet all the robed staff members as well as a couple of armed robots.

"What, you guys can't take a joke?" asked Comedian receiving a war cry form the staff as they charged at him.

* * *

Back with the rest of the team they had found the Headmaster's personal computer and had began to download all the files into the flash drive. Diablo was standing war while Plastic Girl was looking at the download and Jester was waiting for a signal from Comedian on the radio.

"We should go and help him. He may look like he can take on a tank single handedly but he is still learning." said Jester

"We can't just drop everything and go to something else. Our mission is first." said Plastic Girl

Jester then looked at Diablo and he shared a look of sympathy.

"I would love to go and help Comedian but we most likely will get in the way and ruin the mission. Suerte loco de remate. (Good luck you crazy man.)" said Diablo keeping guard

Suddenly a click sounded and the download was finished. Plastic Girl took the flash drive and placed it in her pocket and then proceeded to wipe out any and all recordings of their little mission.

"Alright we are finished. Where is Jester?" asked Plastic Girl

Diablo realized that Jester had gone missing and most probably gone to save Comedian.

"I hate that girl." said Plastic Girl

* * *

Back in the middle of the fight Comedian was holding his own just barely. Comedian had unloaded half of his machine-gun ammunition on the robots and the robed figures, but it seemed that the arrival of the students had made things far more difficult than they were at first. The more and more people came in the less ammunition Comedian had. He had now resorted to punching the people that had gotten close enough to actually hurt him. He had now pulled one of his handguns and shot one of the robots in the head. He then began using the machine-gun as a baseball bat to smack the remaining robed men. Suddenly at the other side of the battle field several firecrackers and smoke bombs going off blinding the mob. As Comedian saw this but missed the winged girl villain coming down from behind him.

"Get your hands off my man you harpy!" yelled Jester as she dropped kick the angel girl.

Jester then landed behind Comedian with a smile on her face.

"What are you doing here?!" asked Comedian

"I thought you needed back up." said Jester

They then turned to see the rest of the super villains coming at them and they got ready to make one final stand until a massive column of fire separated them from the angry mob. Just as they walked away from the fire two hands dropped down and pulled them out of the room and into the air ducts. Both of Comedian and Jester popped out on the roof after being pulled out by none other than Plastic Girl and Diablo.

"Next time, you work with us." said Diablo

* * *

 **Tartarus**

Amanda Waller and Agent Neo did not look happy. The team stood in front of them with bruises and smoky attires.

"So after you disobeyed my orders you thought that it was a good idea to torch down and shoot your way out of Hive academy. These actions would have gotten you killed in any other situation. Did you at least complete the objective of your mission?" asked Waller

"Yes ma'm." said Plastic Girl as she gave her the flash drive

Amanda Waller took it and gave it to Neo.

"All I can say is, good job team." said Waller surprising everyone

The team was confused like never before almost as if Waller was not thinking of killing them. They looked at each other and then back at the senior agents.

"Today you have done what most Special Ops and military men learn after many times on the field and in most cases they do not come back in one piece like you did. Now the next mission will be in a few days take this time to get better and prepare yourselves for the worst. And believe me it will get worse, you are also getting a new teammate tomorrow." said Waller leaving the room

"Good work team. Rest up." said Neo leaving as well

All of the team members turned and decided to celebrate their first mission together.

"Damas y caballeros les doy un mezcal Don Conejo, para celebrar esta ocasión. (Ladies and gentlemen I give to you Don Conejo mezcal, to celebrate this moment.)" said Diablo as he poured four glasses of mezcal.

"Aren't we too young to drink?" asked Comedian

"Ha ha, that's funny. I can see why you are Comedian." said Diablo

"We need to celebrate this." said Jester

"To what do we drink?" asked Plastic Girl

"We drink to a better tomorrow, to friends and to all those that we saved today." said Comedian as a toast

They all drank the mezcal and enjoyed the sensation of it coming down their throats.


	4. The New Guy, Master Thief Sort of

**Voices**

 **Comedian voiced by Yuri Lowenthal**

 **Jester voiced by Janet Varney**

 **Diablo voiced by Daryl Sabara**

 **Plastic Girl voiced by Grey DeLisle**

* * *

 **The New Guy, Master Thief**

 **Tartarus**

The team was doing their newly established daily training routine, starting with a 10 kilometer run around the base, 100 push-ups, and 100 sit ups and finally a run through the obstacle course, all before breakfast. After all four teens went through the course they all went to their table and got started with their breakfast. Comedian was eating fried eggs with bacon and sausages with a cold water. Jester was having chocolate chip pancakes with whipped cream and rainbow sprinkles and lots of maple syrup in the form of a smiling face and to drink an orange juice. Plastic Girl was having a bowl of cereal and chopped fruit with a coffee with milk. Diablo was having a bowl of Frosted Flakes cereal and a cold water just like Comedian.

"How can you eat that much sugar and not gain a single pound?" asked Plastic Girl to Jester

"Have you ever seen the Scooby Doo show? Well I have what they have a very fast metabolism that allows me to stuff my face with all sorts of food and not gain a pound." said Jester

That seemed to satisfy Plastic Girl and then continued to eat her breakfast. However they were interrupted as they were drinking their respective drinks.

"Either that or it all goes to my front and back." said Jester in a non-chalanting manner.

This made the men of the team spit their drinks and for Plastic Girl to almost spit her coffee.

"You know things like that make me question your state of mind." said Comedian coughing

"Well I don't see why you guys are so racked up about, every girl out there likes to keep their figure in check. Some even want to add a few curves to them. I know for a fact that Plastic Girl here always looks at her body in the mirror before going to bed." said Jester making Plastic Girl to spit her coffee and then glare daggers at Jester.

Before the conversation could go into more awkward territory the speakers began to sound with the voice of agent Neo.

"Team report to the debriefing room now. Your next mission will be soon." said Neo through the speakers

The team got up and began to make their way to the room, but Plastic Girl pulled Jester aside.

"How and why did you spy on me when I was going to bed?" asked Plastic Girl furious

"I have trouble sleeping and I like to go around. By the way I think you and Diablo make a very good couple, you certainly think so even though you don't show it." said Jester

That last comment made Plastic Girl blush hard until she looked like a tomato head with steam coming out of her ears.

 **Debriefing Room**

The team had arrived at the debriefing room and both Waller and Agent Neo were waiting with them, but along with them there was another person. He was wearing a pair of black pants, a blue snow jacket with ski glasses, a light blue scarf and ice cap.

"Who's the snowman?" asked Comedian

"This here is Kid Kold. He will be working with you guys for today's mission. In exchange of getting time off his sentence." explained agent Neo

"Iced to meet you fellas." said Kid Kold

"Poor guy, you must have a speech impediment, don't worry you are amongst friends." said Comedian making fun of Kid Kold's bad pun

"Hey, I do not have a speech impediment!" said Kid Kold

"Oh, I get it. You accidentally froze your brain and that is why you sound like a five year old kid." said Comedian making Jester laugh

"I did not AND I DO NOT!" screamed Kid Kold

"ENOUGH!" screamed Waller making everyone turn to see her.

"You five have a mission that I want done and I suggest you take this seriously." said Waller letting Neo take the floor

Neo then brought up a picture of a man dressed in a completely white suit, with grey hat, gloves and belt. The mask only covered the upper part of his face and left the rest exposed such as a small pointy mustache. This made Plastic Girl widen her eyes at the sight of the picture.

"This here is Andre Le Blanc, he is a master thief that goes around stealing priceless jewels from banks and impressive safes, there is not much else to say about him personally except that he is French and has made the United States his personal and professional playground. He is not that successful against heroes such as the Teen Titans, however he has recently been stealing items that are far more valuable than ordinary jewelry. Over the last few days he has attacked and stolen vital information from different government facilities." said Neo

"If he changed his target then that means that he is doing this for someone else." added Comedian

"That is what we believe. Your mission is not only to catch Le Blanc in the act but also to recover any and all stolen intel, find out who he is working for as a bonus. Kid Kold is familiar with Le Blanc's methods and will help you. We suspect that he will strike at the Geo-Labs a government facility that fits his new M.O." said Neo

"Get your stuff and be ready to depart in two hours." said Waller

The team plus Kid Kold went to the armory to gather their gear, with Kid Kold still trying to show that he was the big deal but the team put him down.

"So I went to no special super villain school I just went out and began to make a name for myself, of course I did date this girl that could really put a jinx on you. You know what I mean?" asked Kid Kold

"I am going to guess that not even you know about that." said Jester

"Oh, come on doll face, give me a smile." said Kid Kold walking up to Jester with Comedian slowly grabbing his guns.

"Okay." said Jester walking up to Kid Kold

Jester got close to Kid Kold before grabbing him by his jacket and then kneeing him in the stomach causing him to bend in pain searching for air.

"Next time you talk to a girl like that, remember us _women_ can hurt you in far worse ways." said Jester in a whisper on Kid Kold.

The rest of the team smiled at the pain and the swiftness that shut Kid Kold silent.

Plastic Girl meanwhile was making sure that her gear was in place with a somewhat agitated pace almost as if she was aching for the mission to be over. Only Diablo noticed this and decided to speak to her.

"Hey, is everything alright?" asked Diablo

"Yeah, just wanting to put Kid Kold and Jester under a bus." said Plastic Girl

"If you need anything just tell me. Remember we are a team." said Diablo

Plastic Girl began to think on the words that Diablo had just spoken and began to think back on her past and on her family. She had been raised by her mother and step-father in a normal home in Queens, New York. She had been happy despite not knowing who her real father was. She always knew that her father was the reason that she was like this, the reason for her powers. Despite not knowing him personally she knew that she had taken after him in more ways than one. She then banished these thoughts from her mind because she knew that they had a mission to complete.

* * *

 **Geo-Labs**

The team had arrived at Geo-Labs right on schedule and began to patrol the area that Le Blanc was most likely to strike. The mood was tense especially since the team was more interested in putting holes on Kid Kold than on Le Blanc himself.

"All I am saying is that once you date a girl that can determine the outcome of anything with bad luck it must be all down hill from there right." said Kid Kold over the radio

"Jester, please nail him in the groin next time." said Diablo through the radio

"That I do not think it is possible Diablo. One must have a groin for that to work." replied Comedian on the radio

"You two are just jealous that I have far more lady experience than you two." said Kid Kold

"You do realize that for that it only counts as experience if the girl is real and sees you more than once, right?" replied Comedian making Jester and Diablo laugh and Kid Kold to scream in frustration.

Plastic Girl was not paying attention due to her mind being in in her past and her problems.

Suddenly they were all notified that the alarm system had been triggered on the west wing of the facility. The team began to make their way there until Plastic Girl stopped and began to make her way to the East Wing. No one but Diablo noticed this.

"Plastic Girl where are you going? The alarm was triggered in the West Wing." said Diablo turning to catch up with Plastic Girl

"It is a diversion. A tactic that makes all the guards and security to go to one place where they think you will go but instead you are pulling the heist on the opposite end with your real target." explained Plastic Girl as they ran to the East Wing

"How do you know this?" asked Diablo

"Because he taught me all I know about being a thief!" said Plastic Girl

* * *

 **West Wing**

Comedian, Jester, and Kid Kold arrived at the West wing with haste. Kid Kold pulled out his ice ray gun and proceed to blast everything in sight, which lead to the floor to be covered in ice. As soon as Comedian stepped inside he slipped and ended up crashing into a desk making the entire place look like a mess.

"Is it a good bet to say that he is going to hurt me?" asked Kid Kold

At that moment a bullet shot Kid Kold in the arm.

"Yes." said Jester helping Comedian up to his feet.

"First off Brain Freeze you are not suppose to open fire unless you have the target on sight, and second since you are the expert tell us now where is the target most likely to strike?"asked Comedian

"I honestly would go for the most secure place in the area those places have always the best form of loot." said Kid Kold holding his arm's bullet wound

"Everyone search and find Le Blanc." ordered Comedian

The team then split up and began searching for the infamous jewel thief. The team searched top to bottom but there was no sign of Le Blanc. He was not on any of the labs that had valuable government intel. No one had set foot on the different labs and the different places where the most valuable parts of government information could be stored but no sign of Le Blanc in any of them.

It then was cleared to the three agents was that Le Blanc had tricked them.

* * *

 **East Wing**

Diablo and Plastic Girl had just arrived at the main room of the East Wing and began looking for Le Blanc.

"Ok, so you were taught by this guy in how to become a thief?" asked Diablo

"Yes, I'll tell you about it later." said Plastic Girl as they looked for Le Blanc

Then they heard a noise in the other room and with the agility and fines of a wrecking ball Diablo and Plastic Girl broke the door open to find the jewel thief grabbing confidential papers.

"Well, well, well if it izn't my petit protege Abigail. What are you zoing here?" asked Le Blanc with a French accent

"Stoping you and your annoying accent." said Plastic Girl shooting a punch like a bullet that Le Blanc narrowly avoided.

They entered in combat with Diablo joining in with his hell fire whip. Plastic Girl used her powers to shoot her fists and kicks at great speed to crush Le Blanc but he used his acrobatic skills to jump over and duck under the combined attacks of the two super powered teens.

"Tell me White, why are you doing this I always thought that jewels were far better for your tastes than classified documents?" asked Plastic Girl

"You know me better than zat my little thief. I am zo smarter than that." said Le Blanc running out of the room

As the heroes took up pursuit Diablo blasted some small balls of fire in order to make Le Blanc slow down, and it was slowly working thanks to Plastic Girl's advise.

"Keep firing to the sides, keep him going straight." said Plastic Girl as Diablo did just that.

Le Blanc then dropped a smoke bomb in order to make his movements harder to predict. As the smoke began to thicken the visibility of the two teens began to lessen. However, Plastic Girl twisted her right arm until it looked like a screw and then she shot it making it look like a twister punch. This created a small vacuum of air that blew all the smoke away and cleared the path and Le Blanc's position.

Le Blanc turns and saw that and a look of fear appeared on his face. However the look of fear was not from the demonic looking teenager with fire covering his entire body, no. Le Blanc was scared to death by the angry look on the face of Plastic Girl.

As the teens got closer Le Blanc tried to reason with then in order to either get scot free or until he found a way to escape.

"Wait, I know that you are alzo looking for the ones that hired me right?" asked Le Blanc

"You are not weaseling out of this." said Plastic Girl

"Besides our team leader can always beat you until you talk. ¿A qué no pensasté en eso? (You didn't thought about that did you?)" said Diablo as he melted the floor with a carpet of fire under the feet of Le Blanc.

With Le Blanc in custody the team had gathered outside the labs and gave the jewel thief to the special ops team that was sent to pick them up.

Kid Kold was taken away to his cell after the team returned to Tartarus. The team then went on to do their own things but Diablo followed Plastic Girl to see how she was doing.

"So you want to talk about what happened?" asked Diablo

"Yeah, sure." said Plastic Girl

"How exactly did you meet that guy? I mean he doesn't look like the kind of guy that is listed in the yellow pages." said Diablo

"I kind of caught him once when he was trying to steal a bank that I was trying to rob myself. He then decided to teach me a few things, but I later ditched him because he was a bit of a jerk." explained Plastic Girl

"Why were you going to steal from a bank anyway?" asked Diablo

"Because that bank had refused to give my father a loan to pay my mother's health bills. I'm not sure you understand." said Plastic Girl

"I understand, believe it or not I am always trying to help my family. Listen if you ever need someone to talk to just say so, and if anything is bothering you just tell me and I will turn it to ash." said Diablo making Plastic Girl laugh a bit

"Call me Abigail." said Plastic Girl kissing Diablo on the cheek


	5. Clash of the Titans

**Clash of the Titans**

 **Tartarus**

The team was doing one of their normal training routines. Comedian was in the shooting range taking down targets. Diablo was sparring with Plastic Girl in the ring blocking and exchanging punches with one another. Jester was starting to run around the obstacle course for a third time and she was currently dodging the incoming rubber bullets.

The team had gotten to bond much asset their last few missions and the time that they have been living together. Despite them being a special black-op group that followed the orders of the government and dealt with the people that most people wanted nothing to do with, the team had grown quite fond of each other. They were being friendly or at least to the outside world pretended to be friendly to one another. As well as the teens had been getting better at following their mentor Neo and their boss Amanda Waller.

Suddenly an alarm began to sound all over the secret base making the team to turn and see their mentor Neo at the entrance with a serious expression.

"Team to the debriefing room, now!" said Neo with firmness

The team dropped what they were doing and headed straight to the debriefing room where Amanda Waller was awaiting their arrival. She looked like she was angry and looking for someone to shoot or to at the very least shout until they were six feet underground. The team didn't bother to sit down they all stood ready to rush to the armory and gear up for their latest mission.

"Listen up Titans! Hell has broken loose on Jumpstart City! Crime is on the rise and no one has an explanation! We have tried to contact the League and the Teen Titans but neither team is responding." said Waller in anger

"We know that the Justice League is currently off world dealing with an intergalactic conqueror and are busy at the time being. However, the Teen Titans cannot be reached in their tower for some reason. Your mission is to go to Jumpstart City, take down as much crime as you can and figure out what the hell happened to the Titans. Is that understood?" asked Neo

"Understood sir." said Comedian

"Yep." said Jester from behind Comedian

"We got it." said Plastic Girl

"Yeah." said Diablo

"Good. Go get ready, we are going to a war zone." said Waller narrowing her eyes.

The team ran to the armory and gathered their gear. As they armed themselves they couldn't help but feel like they might be going to the most difficult battle of their lives. As they armed themselves with both lasers, gadgets, armor and good old fashion lead guns the team tried to mentally prepare themselves for whatever pit of hell they would be stepping into.

* * *

 **Jumpstart City**

The team was flying in a completely armed and ready helicopter, it had more bullets and guns than Comedian's closet and that was no exaggeration. From the helicopter the team and Neo could see the giant monsters attacking, large columns of smoke coming from the fires caused by the gang riots, and of course all the people were looting and taking whatever they could. Above all the chaos the team noticed that the legendary Teen Titans, the team that had made Waller create their own, was no where to be seen. The only thing that was visible of the Teen Titans was their large T-shaped headquarters.

The helicopter had dropped the team outside of the city limits and soon enough took off once more to get as far away from the chaos as possible. The team then turned their sights towards the city and began walking. Neo took the lead followed by Comedian and the rest of the team.

"Alright team, stay sharp, if you see something coming at you you either kick its butt or you take out. No mistakes." said Neo as they entered the city

"Plastic Girl look for back street alleys that can get us to the tower as quickly as possible." said Comedian to Plastic Girl

"On it." replied Plastic Girl

The team quickly began to move through the back alley streets trying to be as quiet as possible. They hoped to reach the home of the Teen Titans without arousing any suspicion from the chaotic groups. However, with everything in the life of a black-ops team nothing is ever so sweet and easy.

The wall infant of the team blew up revealing a gang of street thugs armed to the teeth. The leader of the gang stepped up and pointed his gun at the team hoping to scare them.

"Hey you punks this is now our turf, get lost or get shot, ya hear me?!" said the gang leader

"Team. Sick 'em." said Neo calmly

Comedian wasted no time and charged at high speed towards the leader and struck him square in the jaw with the butt of his shotgun knocking him out. He then shot one of his shotgun shells at one of the most armed thugs taking him out. Just as the rest of the gang of thugs aimed their guns at Comedian their guns began to heat up and melt into their skins. Diablo just stood there with his red marked face and a fiery raised palm. Then half of the remaining things were struck with electric marbles that Jester had just shot from her new slingshot with a mischievous smile. Then the rest of the thugs got slammed into a wall by a giant truck sized palm courtesy of Plastic Girl.

"Twenty one seconds, good. You have improved since the last time. Let's go more of them will be hear soon, so let's pick up the pace." said Neo

* * *

As the team made their way to the large T-shaped building the team couldn't help but wonder why Neo was so set on reaching the Teen Titans. Eventually the teens began to wonder amongst themselves.

"So any idea why we are going at triple time speed for these Teen Titans?" asked Comedian

"I am more worried that Neo is acting like a complete dictador (dictator) with no emotions except for anger." said Diablo

"Hey, come on be nice." said Plastic Girl

"That is why I said dictator." responded Diablo

"Maybe he is from this city and just wants to save it." said Comedian

"Or maybe he has a crush on one of the Titans." said Jester earning raised eyebrows from the rest of the team

"You do realize that they are all around our age, right?" said Plastic Girl

"Have you seen what that girl Starfire wears? She clearly has nothing to hide. Besides, Neo is clearly at the wrong side of forty and as far as I know has no girlfriend." explained Jester

"You guys know I can hear you, right?" said Neo not turning his head

"Sorry boss. We were just curious." said Comedian

"It's alright. I actually am not from this city nor have a "crush" on one of the Teen Titans. When the city was first invaded by aliens I was amongst the first to go and fight them, but due to politics and the aliens' threat we were unable to do anything. If it hadn't been for the Teen Titans this city would be nothing but a hole in the ground." explained Neo

"You feel indebted to them." said Comedian

"Yes. But more than that, they remind me that there are times in which laws that are meant to protect the people become shackles that allow the bad guys to escape and sometimes you have to work outside the law because there are those that do not play by the rules." explained Neo

"We will find them and figure out what is going on." said Comedian as they arrived at the small boat yard to go to the heroic teenage headquarters.

"Plastic Girl see if you can hack into the tower to see if there are any entrances straight to the tower." said Neo

"This is a team of heroes with a guy that is both a literal and figuratively a tank of technology, it may take me some time to get through and oh...I think I just got in. Weird." said Plastic Girl as she continued to hack through her portable laptop.

Plastic Girl managed to hack into the blueprints of the tower hoping to find a entrance. The team found the entrance that the team of heroes used to enter the city from their tower. The Suicide Titans made their way through the tunnel all of them ready for any form of ambush or at least a defense system. However, they just found a sign that said 'do not enter unless you are the pizza delivery guy'. After ignoring the sign The team found themselves in the Teen Titan's garage. Just as they were about to enter a thought came from Plastic Girl.

"Wait, this place must have some of the most high end security of the city, right?" asked Plastic Girl

"Yeah, which makes you being able to hack it in less than a few minutes is quite the surprise." said Jester

"Exactly. Whoever is behind this is either very lazy or a bad joke." said Plastic Girl

"What do you mean?" asked Diablo

"It means that whoever is in this tower is not the Teen Titans." said Comedian

"Let's find out." said Neo as the elevator arrived

* * *

 **Titans Tower**

The team found it weird that the tower of a superhero team would have dumb music and stickers on the walls of the elevator.

"Well this is anti-climactic." said Comedian

As the elevator went up to the top floor Neo and the rest of the team thought that everything was far too quiet. That thought went out the window once the Suicide Titans reached the top floor. As the door opened the eyes and ears of the Suicide Titans were assaulted by bright colors and obnoxious garbage that was being passed as normal sounds.

"¡Santa Madre de Dios Estoy ciego! (Holy mother of God, I'm blind!)" screamed Diablo covering his eyes as the elevator suddenly opened

"MY ears, is someone murdering a cat with a bike chain?!" asked Comedian covering his ears.

"Guys, I feel like throwing up." said Jester covering her mouth.

"What is going on?" asked Plastic Girl

"I don't know. But all I know is that this is some strange pit of Hell." said Neo slowly opening his eyes.

In front of the team was what could only be described as small annoying chibi versions of the famous Teen Titans. Or in this case Toddler Titans. Robin the leader of the team was spouting nonsense like a complete psychopath, that would make the Joker look sane. Raven was watching a really bad knock off of My Little Pony with a smile that would make even the happiest man alive sick. Starfire was liking a large worm-like creature and being a complete air head that would make the classic high school stereotype look like Albert Einstein's assistant. Cyborg and Beast Boy were burping into each other's faces while singing raps so abysmal that would make people riot in the streets and burn every single rap song that existed. One thing was clear for the Suicide Titans, these were not the same heroes that saved the city from aliens.

"What. The. Heck. Is. Going. On?" asked Comedian getting the attention of the supposed teens

All the Teen Titans turned to see the newly arrived team just standing there.

"Who are you people?" asked "Robin"

"Who we are is no longer the greatest matter now. Who are you and were are the Teen Titans?" said Neo as the team and him aimed their weapons at the imposters.

" _We,_ my incredulous friend, are the Teen Titans!" yelled "Robin" while posing dramatically

"No, you are not." said Diablo

"Oh yeah, and what makes you think so BOYEEE!" said "Beast Boy" making Diablo cringe at his attempt at slang

"Because you look like a low budget rip-off of the heroes." explained Plastic Girl

"I assure you mama I ain't no rip-off." said "Beast Boy" in a manner that made Plastic Girl feel dirty in the wrong way.

"If you are the heroes that you claim to be, shouldn't you go save your city from tearing itself a new one?" asked Jester

"Yeah, so call the police." said "Cyborg" completely unsympathetic to the situation.

"I think the last police car was being used as a beach ball by Cinderblock and Blackout." said Comedian struggling not to pull the trigger.

"Enough of this nonsense! Where are the TEEN TITANS?!" screamed Neo in anger shaking "Robin" in anger

"Neo these guys are not worth it. Let's go and save the city ourselves." said Comedian putting a hand on Neo's shoulder

"That sounds like The challenge." said "Starfire"

"No not really." said Diablo

"I say we show these posers who is the best team!" said "Raven"

"Again, no." said Comedian

"You what a challenge you got one! TITANS G..." yelled "Robin" only to receive a shotgun blast to the face courtesy of Comedian

Everybody looked in horror as Comedian had just killed someone.

"Sorry I just couldn't stand it any more." said Comedian

"Plus they have no soul that I can see." said Diablo

Suddenly from the floor came another "Robin". Making the Suicide Titans grin.

"Diablo, you said they were not really alive right?" asked Neo

"Yep." responded Diablo

"Team, take them down with all necessary force." said Neo lifting his rifle

"Thank you, boss." said Jester as she kick nailed the so called "Beast Boy" where the sun doesn't shine.

The team wasted no time massacring all of the copies. Just like Diablo had said they were all soulless. Whenever they were shot, burnt, or slammed they would turn into a grey disgusting goo.

Diablo blasted fire through the armies of "Ravens" with ease and those that managed to fight back were quickly sliced with Diablo's hellfire whip. He moved the fire whip at all sorts of angles making any and all attempts of dark magic useless. Diablo then using his fire to jump up in the air and then bring down a blazing inferno burning the copies.

Jester used both of her batons to smack and break the "Beast Boys" she struck all the body joints while jumping acrobatically and breaking all of their bones. Oddly this brought a smile to her face. She then pulled out her slingshot and began shoot explosive marbles into the "Beast Boy's" mouths making them go boom.

Neo used his rifle to turn all the "Cyborgs" into goo scrap metal. He shot with no mercy and nailed many of them in the head with a precession that would only be compared to Headshot's. One of the "Cyborgs" jumped on top of Neo only for him to decapitate that "Cyborg" with a Dessert Eagle combat knife and then shooting the body five times.

Plastic Girl fired her fists at neck breaking speeds at the "Starfires". She didn't waste time with her assault. Plastic Girl kept punching faster and faster until it appeared that she had 100 flying fists colliding with her intended targets. The "Starfires" tried to fight back but they were so easily fooled by Plastic Girl's movements that they didn't see Plastic Girl turning her hands into giant hammers and crushing them into goo.

Comedian seemed to be the one that was enjoying this the most out of everyone else. He wasted no time using his shotgun to blow holes into the bodies of the "Robins" that surrounded him. He then pulled out his twin black pistols and fired at his opponents. He extended his arms to shoot the "Robins" at his sides and then he crossed his arms to double shoot them, just for good measure. He then charged at the rest of the "Robins" who were just spouting orders instead of fighting. Comedian then began to punch the goo out of them with his bare fists and then he rammed a right punch through the last of the "Robins" ending it.

"Did anyone else felt good at turning these impostors to mush?" asked Comedian

"I did." said Jester

"That's our girl." responded Comedian

"Whoever created those things must have the Titans. Follow those tubes." ordered Neo

The team wasted no time and slid down the tubes from which the rip-offs came from and soon they found themselves in a dark evil-looking laboratory. In front of them stood five assembly lines, one for each of the Titans. There were only a couple of people working on the assembly lines meaning that this place was without a doubt almost empty. The team then looked up from the assembly lines and found the real Teen Titans in suspended animation. Then a man in a black business suit stepped forward and began yelling at his employees.

"Faster you scum! We must meet our deadline by next week!" said the boss

"But sir, we can't keep up with this. Many of our workers have attempted to end this madness. Please we beg you put an end to this nightmare." begged the head scientist.

"NEVER! I am only a few weeks away from making the world armies mine. I will dull everyone, and change them with my cheap copies that will do as I command, AND NO ONE IS GOING TO STOP ME!" yelled the boss

"Except me bashing your skull with a baseball bat." said Comedian standing behind the boss man.

"EXCEPT FOR HIM BASHING, wait wha?" began the boss but Comedian cut him off by knocking him out with his shotgun's butt.

"Release the Teen Titans, we got a city to save." said Neo

* * *

 **Tartarus**

It had been two days since the mission and the Suicide Titans were relaxing watching the news.

 _"IN other news Jumpstart City is now back on track, the Teen Titans are once more protecting the city and everything is back as it should be. We are however, unaware of what happened to the teenage superheroes due to them having apparently memory loss. We do know that the villains, street gangs and monsters are once more behind bars. This is Catty Grant reporting for Channel 6. Have a good day."_

"What a nice lady." said Jester

"I wish that the Teen Titans knew that we saved their butts." said Comedian

"It doesn't matter, we did our duty and now the world is back on the right track that is all that matters." said Neo

"Work in the shadows to keep the people safe. I can live with that." said Plastic Girl

"Yeah, besides we will most likely see those heroes again." said Diablo

"On another note, Jester, I am not forty." said Neo


End file.
